It is true what they say; that you don’t truly know what you have until it’s gone. I am (very VERY recently) finding myself able to do more things, endure things longer and feel a little less like the walking-dead. I think the plaquinil is definitely taking affect – I hope it continues to do more … More Update
All it takes is for just one little bit of good news. I don’t need much, just enough positivity and hope to keep me trying. I don’t need definitive answers and certainties of a brighter future, I just need the hope that its a possibility. This week I got a little bit of hope. I … More All it takes
Happy birthday to me! Today I celebrate thirty years of existence and life. Today I feel privileged. When I was a child thirty was my ‘scary-old’ age. Thirty year olds seemed both exceptionally old and simultaneously at the very end of being young. Thirty seemed like a finality, an end, I suppose somehow it seemed … More Today I am 30
Tonight there is so much pain that it takes my breath away. I try to focus on my breathing, but my hands and hips are just burning through my wall of distraction. I can’t believe how inescapable it is. We watched a movie on the lounge and I did my best to hide the agony. … More Pain and a choice
My life has never been balanced in the typical way. It has never been simple and normal and just followed along a seemingly stable pathway with a few small bumps here and there. Nope. My life has been highs and lows, highs and lows all the way. Earth shaking beautiful highs and lows that sting … More Balance.
One thing I have had since I have been sick – and maybe for a few years before that too – is a motivation to do what i can, with what I have. Another thing I have had since I have been sick, is: Not that fucking much of anything. Yet, I still – and I’ll admit … More Update